Ah, Ciao! One of my amicis sends me the electronic mail and he says, Ah Ciao, Gabriele! And I respond-ah, Ciao! And he says, Ah Ciao! And I ask him, are you-ah having an espresso? And he writes, ah No, but I have -ah something to say. Prego, I say. What?

So he tells me that my last blogger made me sound-ah strange-ah! That I would-ah watch Jazione like, how you say, Hannibal Lector?

No, no, no, my amicis! Jazione is a friend. A friend who I need to talk to and who I-ah miss-ah, but, but, but, nothing more-ah.

Basta!

Ah, here's an idea-ah! I put a picture of myself here and you can see-ah how I am just a normal half Italiano, half Sebian.

See?! Very. very normale. And here is a picture of what I was trying to parlare in my last email. It is very very normale.











You see-ah?! Like any due roommates. One goes sleep-ah and the other gazes on him-ah, lovingly, longingly, quietly.


Very very normale.


Ah ciao!


It costs me Due million lira for a flight to Vermont. But I might have to go there. Gabriele's big American adventura! Ah, ciao!

Ah ciao! Still, no worda from Jazione. I thought for sure-ah he would-ah put a comment on my web site-ah, the way he would leave little post it notes on the freedge telling poor Gabriele that he was ah not-ah coming home, or that he had no lira for rent-ah, or that Keith Haring and Michelangelo were ah-sleep-ah on the cold-ah marble floor-ah.

A friend of Gabriele's wrote to him to say, Ciao, Gabriele! And so I said, Ciao! And he said, Ciao! And then I got up from my computer to make an espresso, and when I sat back down-ah I had a cinque emails from my friend. The first three say Ciao! Then, Dove, Gabriele? And then a longer one about how peoples are doing this thing-ah - they write a bunch of things about themselves that no-one knows-ah. My friend-ah, he writes ah-cinque times cinque. That's a too many more of poor Gabriele. I can do cinque things you no know about Gabriele.

Une. My father is Italiano, it is true. But my mama, she is Serbian!

Due. In-ah my bedroom, I have a poster of the Barbra Streisand Superman record like above! I amore it!

Tre. Gabrieles color the favorite? White.

Quattro. Gabriele has celiac disease, which means I no can eat pasta! When I discover this, I almost-ah commit-ah suicide!

Cinque. When Jazione lived with Gabriele, and we were so happy, I would at night-ah, after Jazione go sleep sleep, go in his room, on toe, like mouse-ah, and watch Jazione sleep so peaceful, for due, tre, quattro hours, and leave before he wakes-ah up-ah!

Ciao from Roma!

Ah ciao! I think I found-ah Jazione! He has not-ah gotten ah-back to me though! Poor Gabriele! Ciao, Jazione, I just-ah want to talk to you-ah about some things! Roma, and painting, and pace, and-ah, perhaps, talk-ah about the soap-ah and the garlic-ah and the due, tre, quattro months rent-ah you owe me!

We can have a limoncello and parlare!

Ciao, dove Jazione?

Oh, when I think of Keith Haring and Michelangelo I get so mad-ah! They came and stayed at my apartmento for due weeks, and Jazione never told me that they were coming...anyway, I have due memories - here's the first:

Ah ciao, that they ate all my garlic-ah! Uno clove, OK! Due clove, OK! But the whole garlic-ah!?!





And then, there was this-ah:







Here was my soap-ah when Michelangelo and Keith haring arrived. And below is the same soap-ah after they left-ah:





Ah ciao! They ah massacred it! Che cazzo!

Prego!

He is in a America, I think. And he has these due friends, Keith Haring and Michelangelo. He might be with them somewhere! Maybe they know where Jazione is! Does-ah anyone know-ah Keith Haring?